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Say It Like A Boss: 5 Tips For Leaving Blog Comments

Commenting on a blog is the first step in relationship building.

Good writers put a lot of effort into writing blog posts that attract attention and encourage comments. When you find a post you enjoy, the best way to build a relationship with the writer is to leave a comment.

Unfortunately, social media hasn’t done bloggers any favors when it comes to leaving meaningful, interactive comments. Readers are so used to the click-and-go method, they often fail to leave good blog comments, if they leave them at all.

But that doesn’t have to be how you operate. You can choose to leave high quality comments and use each opportunity to build relationships with the bloggers you love.

So how do you say what you want to say, like a boss?

1. Say something meaningful

When you find something that resonates with you, don’t just say “Nice post” and move on. Tell the blogger why you liked it. Expand on your opinion. Share some insight with them about how it affected you.

Writers need feedback. The Facebook LIKE button is not enough for emotional, emotive bloggers. They need more. Give it to them.

2. Agree to disagree

One of the negative aspects of blogging, especially for women, is that we write safe things, hope everyone agrees with us, and then pat ourselves on the back when they do.

This is not the rule, of course, because there are some very thick-skinned, controversial bloggers out there. But for the most part we just agree with each other, spew out platitudes and move on.

It’s okay not to agree with everything you read. And it’s okay to say so in a kind and uplifting way. If we would practice this more with our comments, I think we’d move closer to being able to do it in our real lives too.

It doesn’t matter if you are non-confrontational. What better way to practice disagreeing with someone than in writing where you can craft a thoughtful response?

Learn to say “I respectfully disagree” and then explain why. Use your words to build your argument. The more you practice, the better you will become and it will spill over into other areas of your life.

Don't be a poser. Say it like a boss. Leave blog comments that foster community and build relationships. #EquippingBloggers

3. Ask a question

There is nothing a blogger loves more than a comment that leads to interaction. Most bloggers ask you questions in their posts. So why not ask one back?

Ask why they said something they did. Ask them how they came to their conclusions. Ask them how you can find out more about the topic or for a recommendation for others talking about the same subject.

Questions are an integral way to get into the head and heart of a writer. In a good way. When you ask a question, the writer has an opportunity to share something more and that’s why most of us write.

4. Community starts with you

When you leave a blog comment, take a look at the other comments and if appropriate, reply to some of those as well. You could say “Hey, I was wondering that too” or “I like your perspective, thank you for making me look at this from a different angle.”

It’s ok to respond to a few others in the stream. You don’t want to hijack the conversation, but jump in and make some new friends. Comments show you who else is reading and how they feel about a topic.

Too often we see people barge in to comment threads and muddy the waters. It doesn’t always have to be like that. You can insert yourself into the conversation in a positive way and make some new friends in the process.

5. Announce who you are

None of the things I’ve mentioned above amount to a hill of beans if you don’t say who you are. There is nothing worse than getting a comment from someone named SweetiePie’sMommy. Listen, that’s great that you are her mom, but I have no clue who you are and maybe no way to get a hold of you, if I like your comment or want to check out your blog.

Use your name (or your pen name). Then add your blog name. Don’t comment just as your blog name, that’s impersonal. What are you a robot?

All comment systems are different so here’s the rule of thumb when signing in to comment.

If possible, sign in as your name @ you blog. So my name appears as Debi @ DebiStangeland.com. You know who I am and where I live on the web. Simple.

Now some systems make you sign in through one of the big social media platforms, that’s ok. Just make sure you’ve filled out your profile there so people can find you.

Other systems, like WordPress.org, automatically redirect to your site if you enter the address in the registration form, but even then, it’s so nice to think, “Oh, Tina from  The Gracefilled Table.”

I love to see my blog friends stop by to chat and it’s helpful to put their names with their sites, because so many times, I forget.

If you are on Disqus, fill out your profile, so that when I click your name I can see your blog address.

Comments matter.

They are building blocks for relationships between writers. They encourage and make you think. Comments make writers better. Feedback gives bloggers something to work on.

Learn how to leave quality comments. Remember, what goes around, comes around. The better you are at leaving comments, the better the comments will be on your site.

Which of these 5 tips will you put into practice today? Pick one or two and then say it like a boss.





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Comments (19)

  1. Reply Betsy Cruz

    Hi Debi, I’m Betsy from Faith Spilling Over. My friend Carmen Horne recommended this post, and I’m glad I stopped by. You have some great food for thought here. I especially like the idea of asking a writer a question. What better way to build more community? And just the other day one of my readers disagreed with me in a nice way. I enjoyed her comment and the way it made me think.

    1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

      Hi Betsy:
      Thank you for stopping by. What a cool testimony to the power of comments. It’s true that we all have something to learn. And comments can be thought provoking whether positive or negative. I’d much rather hear the truth and grow than get a pat on the head and stay stuck in my misconceptions or false ideals. Wouldn’t you?

      I checked out your site. It’s lovely.

  2. Reply Allyson @ All Our Days

    I love these tips. It can be very discouraging to write a post and receive no comments even when you know people are reading it. I also like when people comment with their name and blog name. If they leave a thoughtful comment, I usually hop over to their blog to check it out.

    1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

      I totally agree Allyson. But I also think the better we are at commenting, the better other people will be. We should start a movement – Commenters Unite! I like when others leave their blog name because it takes the “hunting” aspect out of it. Who’s got time for that? Thank for the love today. Happy Blogging!

      1. Reply Allyson @ All Our Days

        Let’s start that 🙂

        1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

          I LOVE it!!

  3. Reply Kathy Pine

    Well, how can I not comment after reading a blog post about how nice it is to comment and give feedback to the author! Thanks for the tips. I have appreciated getting to know you outside of Platform University and appreciate all the help you are giving to bloggers through your community. I have been using comments more and more to let people know I’m paying attention. Because I notice how much, as a blogger, I appreciate that on my own blog! It’s definitely more meaningful than just a ‘like’ not just for encouragement, but, as you say, to get feedback about what you’ve said.

    1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

      I couldn’t agree more Kathy, with everything you said. I feel like leaving comments also tightens up my community. There is actual dialogue going on, not just likes and favorites. And yes, it does show we are paying attention when we “speak” to one another.

      Thanks for the love today. I appreciate it and am enjoying getting to know you too. I’m so glad you connected with Zohary Ross. She’s the bomb.

  4. Reply Nifty Betty

    Debi, thank you for these tips. Comments definitely motivate me to keep moving forward with what I am doing. I make a point 2-3 times a week to go and read and comment on fellow bloggers posts. I always try to say what my take away is from what they wrote. So, my take away from your post is announcing who you are. I’ve noticed when I am more personal I get more reaction from readers. Now, how do you change your name to be Your Name @ Your Blog?

    1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

      Nifty, comments motivate me too. They give us hope that real people are reading, don’t they?

      I think you are totally right, being personal draws people in.

      So, changing your name on your comments depends on where you are registered. I use Disqus, so I can change my name in the settings section. When I have to “register” for someone’s comment system, I always type in my name the way I want it to be seen – Debi @ DebiStangeland.com, then when I go back to that site or one that uses the same comment system, it’s usually pops up as a cookie and auto inserts itself. Love that.

      I’d also recommend filling out your profile in the Disqus system so that your web address is in there. When someone clicks your name they will see your picture and your URL and can click right over.

      Thank you for reading today and for commenting. You ROCK!

  5. Reply Alison

    Interesting! I always post as The Pink Tumbleweed but thinking I should reconsider.

    1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

      Definitely Alison. No one wants to have coffee with a tumbleweed, but they’d probably love to have coffee with Alison. Make a personal connection and people will be much more loyal. You go girl!

  6. Reply salvagesisterandmister

    If I am taking the time to leave a comment I want it to be meaningful. One thing I hate is when people leave a comment but you know that didn’t read the article and their comment reflects it. BTW- The blog is looking AWESOME!

    1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

      Ha! You are fantastic. I agree. When people don’t actually read, argh! Thanks for the comment love my local friend. I can’t wait to blog with you.

      1. Reply salvagesisterandmister

        Can’t wait for our meeting!

  7. Reply Lexi Carpenter

    Such great advice. I especially loved how you said its ok to disagree just be respectful.

    1. Reply Debi @ DebiStangeland.com

      Thank you Lexi. I’m so glad you stopped by. Happy blogging!

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